Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
