uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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