ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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