Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
