She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
