I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize