He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
