I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
This is the high leading the old right now
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
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