Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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