Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
