I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
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