People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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