I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize