You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
