I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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