check it out our google latitudes are spooning
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
