1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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