it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
