: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Randomize
