why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
we made out on top of his cat.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
