Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize