Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I think weed is turning my hair brown
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
