But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize
