About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize