Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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