I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Then you guys just all showered together...?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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