just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
