fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
