We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
