My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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