nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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