The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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