The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Randomize
