let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
