White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
