yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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