Non-Jews are for practice
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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