For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Your penis caused this!
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
