Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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