the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
