What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
