I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
