and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
