My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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