This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
thus making me awesome and them whores
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
