i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
