the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
