On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
i think i just lost a toe
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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