She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
