I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
